When the Leaf Fades Away…..

Looking back at 2009 is like taking a roller coaster ride! It was too adventurous with all the curves and ups and downs. Perhaps 2009 was the most hera pheri year of these 24 years of my life.

Now where do I start off? Starting of the year with a high note, had an amazing new year bash at surianelli Estate, Munnar. Waking up to that fresh sun rise, I expected this year to be too clear and bright as the new year sun. But the clarity was missing. I was thrown in to the inevitable “uncertainty period” of my life. Still going through it…

In a way, the year was productive. Two short films –Nijaat and Pegasus- did earn quite a few good remarks. Nijaat was even selected for the II International Documentary and Short Film Festival of Kerala. That was an achievement, seeing my film on a big screen for the first time.. that too on kairali theatre, Trivandrum! Working for “Pegasus” was an amazing experience too. 2009 didn’t leave me that dis heartened when considering my creative part.

2009 was also an year for relationships. It earned quite a few amazing friends. I am notorious for making networking of friends. And this year saw the most no: of people being added to that network! Sre was one among them. Some one with whom I can share anything over a cup of tea, we share the same wavelengths. Wish 2010 will bring us more closely with more cinemas and teas!!!

Sangee (Kunjutty for me) was yet another surprise that 2009 has kept for me. I was in search of an actress for a music video which eventually dint happen(may be it might happen in 2010)! My search ended on sangee (Thanks for ponnu, yet another friend 2009 offered me). The friendship grew and the fragrance was all over. (couldn’t attend her marriage though.. Kunjutty…Taking up this column to say a word of sorry for that and wishing you all the very best that life can bring to such an amazing soul like you)

Through Sangee got to know another sangeetha. Chaku, who has turned out to be my cute little sister. Luttu was another amazing character that I met through her. And there is manuettan, sharanya, KK, Vivekettan,Nikhilettan ,Vasuettan… the list goes on…

And I must mention Nitha.. 2009 made the bonds between us stronger and closer. Laal salam sakaave!

2009 saw me becoming a blogger and a chronic smoker! No regrets for both though! Me becoming a blogger… The main credit goes to my cousin Rahul (who is with me for all my parties) and of course.. Sangee.. Thanks to you folks! The idea of picture blog did work out (www.greyframes.blogspot.com) . Hopefully it will catch up more in 2010. With smoking.. It went to a high and now come down.. trying to quit. Perhaps 2010 mid might see me as a smoke free guy!:)

What else with 2009? What were the memorable moments of 2009 ..? Pointing it down…. Bought a bike (My Taurus.. a 2005 unicorn), put an end to my bachelor life in Chennai (brought amma and sis to Chennai), Sheniettan getting married ( all my family got together which was an unique experience), Quit my teaching job at SAE (it was becoming damn boring), attending Blessy chechi’s marriage( a get together of glitterians), Meeting sangeetha at her house (that was truly an amazing day), Celebrating Friendship day at MGM with my UG folks(what a day we had), attending Rajju’s Marriage at Kannur (A reunion of the folks was really nostalgic), My first day as an asst: camera man with Loku sir(still cant believe it..), Working on 4 commercials as an Asst:Director with John Sir (I am enjoying it more than cinematography to be frank!), The toddy party organised by my students at Bangalore (Truly the best moments of 2009), The one day out door shoot for “Pegasus” at Mahabalipuram and the best of all.. receiving the ALA award for the Best Music video for “Thaniye” at calicut (Literally I was in tears when I received it!… The list may not have an end… it will go on…

But the most disastrous and memorable day of 2009 will be the day I met Chippi (My x girl friend)in front of kairali theatre. Trivandrum during IDSFFK 09! 2009 will be remembered for that alone no matter what!

Wrapping up 2009 on a confused note. But the future looks bright. Hopefully 2010 will have more surprises in the kitty for me. Let this leaf fade away for a brighter greener leaf….Happy new year to you folks!

Again a rebirth!

I am oscillating! yes my mind is going for a toss! i mite be called a insane! but i prefer to be insane! with my family behind to be taken care of and lot other responsibilities.. i chose to quit my job! yes! am i not insane? but i prefer to be insane! And as the old saying goes.. fortune favors the brave!

Now what was the bravery here? I have decided to chase down my dream.. to become a film maker! I know the paths ahead will be difficult, rough and of uncertainties. But i still love to believe that i will make it! Quoting Coelho: "There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve, the fear of failure!" Now that fear was in back of my minds for the past one and half years or so. Now, from some where a confidence and optimism oozes out! 

My graph looks so funny with curves so deep and high! It was steady till i entered the film institute in chennai. Being an asst: Manager in a plantation company  thought that my life was supposed to be steady there. But the pull was irresistible. Tried coming back to my passion. Now this happened.. Life forced me to become a lecturer, teaching cinema. What more do you want? learn more about cinema, be with people who are passionate about cinema.. more over, the prospects of coming back to chennai was amazing! 

Was enjoying teaching. I was planning to have a big footing in this industry. Planning's were accordingly. joined my PG and planned to do Phd once i finish that, write net, JRF... all to become a good academician! 

But again a turn over! cinema is an art. Education is a service. Once these become business... the soul is lost! Satisfaction is gone for a toss! And the future was looking too bleak for me! it was total darkness all around! More over, that pull to chase down my dream. Decided, quit! That was not that as easy as told! but still... 

I still believe in coelho... the entire universe will conspire for me! waiting for that...

LEFT was once RIGHT… But…

The word “LEFT” is more than just a word. It’s a revolution, a refreshing energy, a passion which runs through the veins of all the so called REBELS! Count me, I was one! And still I am! And almost all my friends are rebels, in one way or the other, who stays for the rights and equality.

The word “LEFT” originated from the French Revolution when people who stood for republic and equality sat in the left of the president in the parliament. Over the period of time, LEFT was associated to Communism and Socialism.

As far as I am concerned, I am left. I was a rebel all through out. My first revolt was when I was in 5^th std when I wrote a memorandum to my Head master demanding for a library and clean water in the well for which I faced disciplinary actions! From there on I was always against the authorities! In the college I have even went to knock our vice principal once for his ruthless behavior for which I was thrown out of the hostel! Even when I was in the estate, I was standing for the rights of the labors for which my manager used to scold me always. “You have to be at the side of the management”, he used to tell me always. But how can I be?! 

If I say I am left, it doesn’t mean I am a communist. But I do agree, communist ideologies have influenced me. But I am not a follower of the communist party in India at least for that matter. The thought of Marx of a utopian island with equality has always influenced me. But I am not interested in politics. But still the affinity for the left parties was there, especially for CPM.

The recent developments drift me away from the party too. I have never voted in any of the elections and I am not planning to do it in my life time unless I feel my vote has a value!( I know as an Indian citizen I am doing a crime! I prefer doing it since if I select some one it will be more than a crime!!! ) And at any point of time if I had to vote I would have voted for the left because that was the surety that the party had given to the followers and people of India. The only party with some dignity in India was CPM. But its all lost!:(

I am not blaming anybody. But Comrade V.S.Achuthanandan requires a big support. Communist party is the party of the people. It cannot become a party with dictators ruling it. This will create chaos. Now the party is in the hands of corporate dictators and goondas! Can Left parties keep the promise it offered to its followers once anymore! I still have not lost hopes. Revolutions will happen! Rebels will br re-born to salvate the party and make it the real left.

In short, Left means Rebel! So, Comrade  VS.. You are a true Leftist in every sense. Sakave.. We offer the support to you. Work for the people. If there is no party, people will be there. Party cannot exist without people. The communist dictators will realize it soon…

LAAL SALAAM!!!

 

Fresh Greens

Every new rain brings in hopes... . Hopes of happiness, freshness, sweetness and what not! Recently concluded II International Documentary and Short Film Festival was a new rain all sense! The freshness and hope it brought in can’t be explained through just words!

 

My short film “Nijaat” was selected to be screened. I was invited as the guest! That was an amazing experience! Attending a film festival as guest.. hooo! That was something like a dream coming alive!

 

The Possibility of the short film as a medium… that struck me! Meeting like minded people.. Who are passionate about the movies… who are denied a chance in the so called professional film industry… for us... making movies is not business.. But it’s a passion... a passion right from the bottom of the heart... As they rightly called it... This is the third wave in Indian cinema!

 

But there should be a structured distribution system… to spun in revenue.. Not to earn profit… but to attract more producers for more better quality works.. Today short film makers have more limitations,… That’s a hindrance… Once there is a proper distribution system and ways to generate money through short films and documentaries… There will be more and more inputs into the industry.. Possibilities of internet as a medium have to be explored!

 

Naresh Bedi started off with his film Cherub of the Mist.. and then there was Retrospective of Supriyo Sen.. Oops! These films actually made me look into documentary as a medium seriously.. The possibilities are immense! Wanna learn more and exploit the medium.

 

The 7 days was awesome and was happening… Out of cinema... Met lot of people… made acquaintances.. Krishnan chettan, Vijay Krishnan Sir, SG Raman sir, dhyanesh Zoting, Sanjay… to name a few.. But the penultimate day… That’s the day… I can never ever forget..  Met her… Chippi… now but broken!

 

With that note./… let me stop here